flight / led zeppelin song of the day
flight
the news about charlie kirk has been really freaking me out. particularly the part about how everyone is finding every reason they can to pin it on trans people. as i wrote about here the other day, i got really hooked on the idea that i should move to spain. on wednesday, i spoke to my therapist about all that extensively. about how i want to go on HRT but i'm afraid of all that showing up in my medical records could expose me in the future. they're already trying to subpoena the medical records of trans children in other states.
after much back and forth, we came to the conclusion that -- since i live in a trans sanctuary state, i should just go for it. because if/when they start going after trans ppl like they have already been doing with immigrants, it will most likely happen in red states first and there will be warning signs.
but then on thursday night ken klippenstein put out an article saying his sources tell him the admin is preparing to label trans people as violent extremists, and yesterday the heritage foundation put out a post suggesting just the same. and that, in my mind, sort of nullified everything bit of confidence i had gained from talking to my therapist.
yesterday morning also i went to the doctor and they vaxxed me for shingles and pneumonia b/c i'm supposed to go on immunosuppressants. she told me that the shingles vax in particular may make me feel sick. but then i went to work and i found out that news and by the time i got home i had forgotten all about that and i decided to have some weed because i was anxious so i ate 10mg of edibles.
i started looking at stuff about moving to spain because i had resolved with my therapist to make an emergency plan and just start gathering documents or whatever else i might want to have on if/when i need to flee. and i started to feel very confident that i can do it. i can look for a remote job doing the same kind of work i do now, or something adjacent, with an american company, and if i can find one that's asynchronous then i can move to spain under a digital nomad visa. i have to get a criminal background check from the fbi and i have to get my documents translated and apostille'd and i have to get a medical certificate proving that i don't have the plague and i have to fly to my local spanish consulate and apply for a visa.
around bed time i started to feel pretty delirious because of the weed and also i was developing a fever at the same time and in my delirium, it suddenly occurred to me:
although this is a silly meme, i have often looked to it as a source of inspiration.
in oct 2019, though i don't think there were any bricks i needed to hit at that particular time (there had been the prior year), i decided to get a tattoo of the running skeleton. so i did! and i have it. but i often forget i have it because it's on a part of my body that is always covered by my clothes and which i can't see very well.
well, last night, it entered my brain like divine inspiration. if it sucks, hit the bricks. if it sucks... HIT DA BRICKS!!
i need to hit the bricks when it comes to the entire country. things are bad here. all indicators point to it getting much worse. it sucks here, and real winners quit.
i updated the message on my letterboard as a timely reminder
led zeppelin song of the day
we'll just go with the one i'm currently listening to, which is 'since i've been loving you' off led zeppelin iii.